You will be sitting at home alone, bored, when suddenly you will hear a knock at your door. When you answer the door, you will encounter two very attractive Jehovah's Witnesses. You will invite them in. For three hours you will listen intently, become infatuated with the cause, and decide to join them. When your family discovers this, they will become angry and lock you out of the house. When you are out and about proselytizing, you will be identified as a possible terrorist and arrested. During the next seven years you will meet many exciting new friends in prison. You will start a new jailhouse band known as Druid and the Snoods. One of your ballads, oddly enough, will be nominated for a Grammy. At the Grammys your family will decide to forgive your little life's detour and they all will arrive to greet you in a happy reunion. Unfortunately you will soon discover that your spouse has recently returned from Trinidad, Colorado, the fresh recipient of a sex change.